Today is my "Wednesday Weigh In". Every Wednesday morning since June, I've hopped on the scale to check my progress. Last week, I was 0.2 pounds away from hitting the 30 pounds lost milestone. So, this morning when I stepped on the scale I expected I would finally see that number. But I didn't. In fact, this week - I gained 2 pounds.
I had 2 immediate reactions to this:
1) be really upset and then eat whatever junk food I want today because it doesn't matter
2) be really mad and "buckle down" - counting every morsel that goes into my mouth and banishing all foods that are not vegetables.
But then I started to just pray about it, and ask God to remind me why I'm on this journey and how far I've come. I remembered this section from the book I'm reading right now (You're Already Amazing by Holley Gerth - more on this book is coming soon!)
This list exemplifies the differences between my previous attempts to lose weight and this current one. Growth - not perfection - is the goal here.
The truth is, even if the scale had said the number I'd wanted it to this morning: it wouldn't make God love me any more than He already does (which is already more than my earthly brain can fathom).
There are a bunch of reasons that could've caused the scale to go the wrong way this morning. Maybe it was too many of these amazing granola bars I couldn't stop eating yesterday, maybe it's more muscle, maybe it's stress, or water weight, or that "time of the month" or maybe it just is what it is because I'm not perfect.
And that's okay.
My pants are now 2-3 sizes smaller.
I did all 3 sets of push-ups on my toes for the first time yesterday.
I gained 2 pounds this week, and still made my Green Monster for breakfast instead of getting an Egg McMuffin.
God still loves me.
And that is enough.