Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The Weight

1 Corinthians 12:9-10

There is a number on the scale that has been taunting me for some time now.  Since the end of November the closest I have come to this number is 1.5 pounds above it.  Throughout December I bounced between 1.5 pounds and 4 pounds about the number.  I haven't been able to get past this one darn number.

You see, it's the number I weighed on this day:

Most women who gain weight after their weddings think of that "wedding day weight" as a major goal.  For me, it was that but it is also a major milestone.  I gained a few pounds after we got married, but most of this extra weight was gained throughout Isaac's declining health and after his death.

And as of this morning, I FINALLY broke that number.  I've lost the 25 pounds of "widow weight".  

Mostly, I feel completely and utterly THRILLED with this!  I am so proud and I feel so strong.  But, there's this little piece of me that has struggled to get past this number because in some way, I feel like holding on to that extra weight was a way of holding on to Isaac.  I know in reality that Isaac would be SO PROUD of me for doing this.  He would be cheering me on every pound lost and every time I up my weights at the gym and he might have even choked down a green monster for me.  Okay, that last part might be pushing it.  

Along with the physical weight I have lost, there has been a huge change in the "emotional" weight I've been carrying.  I can't begin to explain how GOOD I feel.  I have more energy, I sleep better, I am more confident, I am in a better mood (usually).  This comes from not just the physical work I've been doing, but the spiritual work as well.  I work hard at staying in God's Word regularly, at praying more consistently, at praising more frequently.  

I can't remember a time in recent memory that I have felt this much peace, joy, and contentment.  I thank God for giving me the strength to keep working at this.  I thank Him for blessing me with 8 months of marriage to someone as amazing as Isaac, who showed me what it really means to have God's strength in even our weakest times.  

Progress photos coming on Friday! :-)
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Find more inspiration at Word Filled Wednesdays and Women Living Well!

7 comments:

  1. Oh wow! it is time for you to celebrate. You have been through so much and God wants to bless you and he is! How exciting. I can't wait until I have 25lbs off my scale! Time to do some walking! Have a wonderful week!

    http://theemptynestexpress.com

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  2. Congratulations!
    My hubby and I are trying to cook and eat salt free and low fat and fewer carbohydrates. Loosing a couple of pounds already. They that WAIT upon the Lord shall loose WEIGHT.
    I may have that one mixed up a bit, but it sounds good.

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  3. Congrats on the weight loss...emotional and physical! I admire you dedication and determination to meet your goals.

    joy & blessings to you,
    Alida

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  4. Congrats!! That is an awesome achievement! I hope to be where you are someday!

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  5. Wow! Congrats! I followed your link because of the "weight" caption, I am currently in the midst of the battle of the lbs., but I am struck by your entire story. Good luck in your journey and prayers that God will give you joy unspeakable in 2012!

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    1. http://www.thebrokenmommy.blogspot.com/

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